I was pondering an expression we may occasionally use, or hear others say, “You leave me with no other choice.” How misguided this is.
Say there’s a couple. The husband turns into a religious follower and he demands of his wife that she accompanies him to church every Sunday. The woman is a free spirit and does not care for church. The husband may say, “In this case, you leave me with no other choice but to part ways.”
Curious, isn’t it, as he does have choices. He can accept his wife for the person she is, respecting her decision and not try to make her see things his way. Alternatively, he may try a compromise by asking her to join him for church only on special occasions. Or, as the only choice he declares he has, he may proceed with a separation. It is not about having no other choice. That declaration is but an attempt to force a choice one makes on another.
Words create reality. We tend to believe in what we say.
We always have choices. My friend Noa likes to say that when we state that, “It’s a problem,” it is because we have a solution but we don’t like it. Similarly, when we state that we have no other choice, we do (have choices,) we just don’t favor them.